Saturday, October 10, 2009

This is a wonderful time , to look back .

This is a time , most of us ... that married a chinese Lady are looking forward to . To finally bring her Home , where she belongs ... to be with her LaoGong . Wherever that might be . This is where Qing and Myself are at this very moment . Waiting one last time to be together for good . This time it will only be for a few more weeks and you can bet the BEE is happy as can be . Of course the same goes for his FLOWER . Knowing my Sweetheart almost two year's and anybody that thinks waiting is easy , have not done it on our scale . I think this is by far the hardest thing we both have done in our Life . Does that change the Relationship ? You can bet it does , this is a foundation to build a marriage on and keep it strong .

This keeps me thinking of course ?
What my LaoPo will and will not like , ones she arrives in the States ? this is now on my Mind , full time . As I want her to be as comfortable as I can make her under the circumstances . I know my Sweetheart " thinks " she know how it's going to be . All nice and beautiful in America , freedom to go and do as one pleases . But that is far from the thruth , it maybe was like that a long time ago . Things have changed and sadly to say , not alway's for the better .

So , what worries me the most ... for my LaoPo ?
I guess , most would say the Culture change ... or the Language difference ... the People ( not as friendly ) ?
I truely think it's none of those , that Qing will have trouble with . The one and only thing on my Mind is , the difference in the Food we eat in the west . One might not think of this as that important , but that is exactly what has me worried . I know , for me it was easy to adjust to chinese Food . Because , I love to try everything ... well that looks good ... anyway . I had no problem to adjust there . Knowing Qing and her eating habit's somewhat , from my Visit's to China . I can conclude honestly ... she will not be too happy with what we are used to eating . I of course wish that I'm wrong , deep inside me say's no you're not .
Can I not say , us westerner's eat at least 50% of our meals from Fast Food places ... either for Breakfast , Lunch or Dinner . Why else , would those places be alway's packed with People ? My Sweetheart , does NOT eat at any of those places , does not eat Potatoe's or Cheese . Go figure ... how much we consume of these two item's alone ? I don't mind the change to chinese Food after she get's here , but will she ???

This say'd , there is one more thing ... that also needs attention . Driving a Car , which is an obsolute must here in the Los Angeles area . The public trans-portation is just about as good as walking ... aweful to say the least . But , I have two Car's ... so I'm getting my little Truck ( which is easy to drive ) ready for my LaoPo . All she needs is lesson's , easy ... right ?
I dont think so , as our Laws and driving style is like day and night . But my LaoPo is smart and will learn fast , I'm sure of that .

So as far as I'm concerned , it's the Food to worry about .


  1. Hi Arnold! I think Qing will adjust in a hurry to the food as long as you have access to an Asian grocery store. :D She can shop for the essentials there and then buy local produce at the American supermarkets. Many Asian dishes appear to be stir fried, so if she has access to fresh vegetables and Asian spices, I'm sure she will be able to make some meals similar to ones she eats in China that you both will enjoy. I suspect you will rarely eat out at fast food restaurants, as home cooked meals are SO much better - both tasting and for you. I think transportation/driving will be the biggest worry for her. Are there any stores or a small mall within walking distance of your home? Is there a bus stop nearby? It may be a while before she feels ready to take on the LA freeway traffic, as it can be quite the adventure as you well know. Take care and best wishes to you both!!!

  2. Carl , here in Palmdale ... there are not much of any Asian Grocery Stores . A lot of Chinese Restaurant's . Most Supermarket's have somewhat of a selection available , but it a far cry from she might need to be contend with . Chinatown is 70 miles from my Home , not a drive to be doing ones a week . Here there is nothing within walking distance , unless your going for just that .. a Walk . Haha
    The nearest Bus stop is a good mile or more . It will take her to the Malls and some of the nicer Department stores and many other's , but ... can't send my Wife Shopping everyday . Haha

  3. I have very similar concerns about the food issue. I have given this issue a lot of thought over the past few months, and I also think this is going to be one of the hardest things to overcome.

    I am also concerned about my lao po's lack of friend network when she gets here. As you well know Arnold, the network of friends is very important.

  4. Yes Martin , because of Qing's English being " good " it is a big plus for her , because she will also have many Friends here already waiting . About chinese Friends , we have many chines Restaurant's here .. it's easy to befriend one or two or three People working at them . I'm sure they would be just as happy to get to know somebody new .
    I guess , this is just something we must find out and see ones she get's here . It's like us going for the first time to China , many questions ... but no answer's till you actualy go .

  5. Arnold and Martin, if your wives talk to other Asian people in the area, I'm sure they will find out quickly where to shop for the Asian spices and other necessities. Driving 70 miles once a week to pick up supplies might be a bit much Arnold, but once a month should not pose much of a problem - just stock up! My Chinese friend here goes about once a month to the Asian grocery store in another city about 45 miles, but I'm sure she would still insist on going even if it was 70 miles, as they carry lots of the ingredients needed to make those mouth-watering dishes.

    For friends, Martin, if you can sign her up for some community education classes nearby, it might help her to learn a new skill, and more importantly to meet people in the area. From what I've seen and read, most Chinese think their English isn't good enough and are embarrassed to talk to native speakers, so lots of encouragement and maybe watching a ton of English TV shows will help them overcome that obstacle.

    Best wishes to both of you!

  6. Thank you Carl , your a great Friend to have around . Martin and I will use your suggestions and hope it will lighten our Lady's worries at least in that department what Food concerns .

  7. Arnold, I'm sure she will do just fine. Chinese cooking is nothing if not inventive. I bet she will find food in the local stores that she can rustle up something that tastes really good to her and you.
    I'd be more worried about the driving to be honest! If she is used to driving in China its probably going to be harder for her to get used to western driving than if she hadn't driven before but with patience and quiet roads and a dedicated instructor (you!) she'll be just fine.

    They say love conquers all, I bet no matter what the hurdle there is over there its nothing compared to what you have been though already to get her there!

  8. Thanks Irish , maybe I'm worrying about the wrong thing ? It's just what she thinks of western Foods ( all fattening and not healthy ), but I'm sure she will adjust somehow . We all are creature's that adjust to our surrounding's ... right ?
    She has driven before , but not for very long . I don't blame her , the way they drive ... one need nerves of steel .

  9. Hi Arnold :)
    Reading your blog since a few days, and when I read you, so, I am asking me many questions about Liyan, if she could come in France, how would it be for her to change many things...
    Well, honestly, you're talking about food, and from what I can have heard and what I know about U.S food, for sure, it seems that more than 50% of food is always sandwiches/fast foods... but anyway, I'm sure there are some shops/markets/supermarkets where man can buy some different food from fastfoods, right? :)
    And so, if you and Qing like cooking, then, i'm sure you wouldn't worry about food :)

    Anyway I wish you both the best when, once again, you'll be together, forever, in U.S.A and i'll enjoy reading your posts here and on the forum ;)

    Good luck for Qing about driving lessons :)